Success Guarenteed

I am happy to be able to make this announcement to the future: My success is now officially guaranteed. I will, without a doubt, be bringing in $50,000 a month within a few years.

I predicted that I'd start making money online, and that one came true, but that was out of pure commitment to the task. This prediction includes that, but is also more solid...

The three reasons my success is GUARANTEED:

1. Obviously, my level of commitment is there. If I lose it, I lose my guarentee.
2. My conversion system will use split-testing to continuously improve, so even if I don't yield profit from PPC right away, I can send free traffic at it to improve conversion ratios.
   
3. The vault provides me with endless traffic sources. I'm downloading gigs and gigs from the vault's Net:Traffic search, just in case I can't get at that information later.

If you feel trapped, I will free you soon enough! Help me speed things along if you want to hear freedom ring just a little bit sooner...